Friday

Oh what a day, today is the first day of break :) I’m really excited for this break, I really need it. I’m in an awful cheerful mood sitting here listening to Yeah Yeah Yeah’s. I’ve learned a couple new things within the past couple days.

One, I need to control my emotions better. I’m not gonna let anything really fully get to me. Lately I have been which isn’t good for my panic attacks.

Two, I learned that I have to rethink all my friends and see who are the true ones and the ones that aren’t. I did that today :)

That’s about all I have learned in the past 3 days. My birthday was swell. I realized this week also that it is so hard going through a day without seeing Noah. He really means more then the world to me. Even when I get mad at him for something completely stupid, I still love him. I’d be nothing if I lost him again. He is the boy that keeps me on my toes and I love it. Also along with all of this I have become “good friends” with his best friend, Niki. I don’t really know what to call her, she is really nice. I thought I would hate her, but I don’t. She is just as spazzy, energetic, and loud as me. It’s fun making new friends that aren’t fake. Majority of my past friends have been fake, which is lame. Well I’m just gonna keep the good true friends the closest to me, while the others I’m just gonna exclude myself from their lifes. I’m done with their immaturity and drama. To add to my cheerful new outlook on life currently, I’ve had way more confidence. Which is a total change compared to the way I normally think. I workout more, it’s a must. I’m eating more comfortably. I’m completely honest with people, instead of keeping to myself. Even at school where normally I’m quiet because I don’t want people to the see the REAL me, I’ve been being my normal blunt bitchy self. I find my new look on life entertaining, I’m waiting to see what I’ll do next. Oh, I always forget to mention good things. I know what I want to do for college and career. I’m gonna become a Relationship/Marriage Counselor also I want to design Lingerie. Haha, now I’m done. That was a lot, but I had to get it all out there. Bye.

Stressed

Its a feeling in your stomach, and mind.
Mentally I am stuck in a bind.
I keep hitting the search button to find the answers to all my problems.
Im on the look for the right path,
The path that leaves me feeling good about myself.

Stomach lurches.
Head explodes.
You have me stressed.

Elsewhere

I wish, I want, I need to be elsewhere.
My life here has gone nowhere, but down hill.
I sit around and watch the clock tick backwards,
It never goes forward.
Time moves to slow for my pace.
I wish to be elsewhere.

But wishing has gotten me nowhere.
I need to be patient,
I need to just sit and wait.
Ignore the slow motion backwards time.
I will enjoy my life.